The Big Q: Why did a recruiter ask about my girlfriend?Posted over 4 years ago by Client Server

Q : I'm a software developer who lives in Portugal and I applied for a more senior role in London. It looks great on paper, so I was excited when the recruiter managing the role thought I would be a great fit.

Then things got... weird.

During the first call with the recruiter, we ran through a series of tech questions as standard, and then he started asking me about my personal life. "Do you have a girlfriend? How does she feel about moving to London?"

WTF does my girlfriend have to do with anything?

A : Believe it or not, recruiters aren't prying into your personal life for the sake of it. It's an important to ask about your motivations, particularly when you're looking to relocate for a job.

You may have already weighed up the pros and cons of you moving, but have you thought about what it means for your partner or family? Would they be able to work in the new location? Would they be able to get visas? Have you considered things like schools and neighbourhoods? Do they even want to move?

Oftentimes when we apply for exciting jobs in new places, we fail to see the forest from the trees. It's important that if we're putting you forward for a job, we're not doing you or our clients a disservice. We want you to apply for a role that's right for you, professionally and personally.

Let's be honest - if you apply for a job in a city that your partner doesn't want to move to, there's a pretty good chance you're not going to take it. So, we're going to ask about your girlfriend - not to be weird, but to be thorough.

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